i just got home from school. i haven't change my clothes yet. i just had to write this down. ok and stalk someone too.. haha.. i'm addicted to him. urgh. pathetic really.

oh well. i think i'm going to die here in qc. i inhaled a great deal of smoke from vehicles today. i barely can breath. i think my lungs is filled with dust, smoke and everything but clean air. i miss the province. no pollution. trees. lots of them.

my throat is sooo itchy... i want to cough to relieve it from the itchiness although it's only for a split second. *sigh..

my eyes hurt. i think i'm going to have a headache but still i'm here. right in front of the freakin computer, glued.

i feel so weary... torn. longing. missing something. craving for something. incomplete.

hay naku. the sem is nearing its end. i feel like nothing has changed. except that i have new crushes, i'm a sem older, that's a school year minus 1 sem, i have new knowledge. (ok maybe some things changed.)

ano ba naman ito. inaantok ako, but i try to fight it dahil wala lang.

i'm procrastinating again. malapit na ang exam sa econ 11 ulit. pati sa pol sci. i haven't started reading anything in our report 108, i blew my speech for comm3 (sabi ko na nga ba dapat nagdemo na lang ako eh!). hay kumusta naman kaya ang grades ko ngayon. sabi nila dapat ang isipin mo ay may natutunan ka, grades doesn't matter. hay mga tao talaga they try to fool themselves in anyway possible. di ba naman ang grades follow your performance. paanong may natutunan ka kung di mo maapply ang sarili mo? hay naku... pero para di maging ipokrita, i too say that bulls**t to myself at times. pathetic talaga..

hay naku, di ako makapagpre-enlist ng maayos. i still don't know what subjects to take. magiging loner kaya ulit ako sa aking mga subjects? sana hindi naman na. ayoko na. ayoko ng magmukhang kaawaawa.

just letting loose my thoughts. naiinis lang. frustrated. depressed.